Ah, online technical support - you've got to love it.
A couple of weeks ago I contact the HP online help thingy* about an intermittent problem I have with my printer, explaining in some detail the steps I was having to take to correct this and asking if perchance there was an easier way. They responded with instructions that were not only deeply patronising in tone but also told me less than I already knew about sorting the prob out.
And now they are badgering me with emails like a lovesick suitor, begging me to tell them how they did - "Was I good? Did the earth move for you too, darling?". Frankly my dear, you were rubbish! So don't expect a second date.
* Ironically, it's called HP Total Care - my arse!
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